When I was in high school, one of my youth leaders was struggling with infertility. She would never come to church on Mother's Day, and I basically thought she was a big baby. I just didn't understand why she couldn't come that one day. In the last couple of years, I've thought a lot about that and I totally get it now. I think even if I wasn't infertile, I would still be more compassionate as an adult than I was as a know-it-all teenager. It's the day where moms get flowers at church and the pastor asks moms to stand up so we can clap for them. Great if you're a mom. Not so great if you can't be one...even if it's for a reason other than infertility. Not only does it make you feel sad, it makes you feel shameful.
So let's just face it. Mother's Day sucks. It's a day where we celebrate moms. I think it's a very important day but that doesn't mean it's not a punch in the gut. For this girl who may never get to be one (although my fingers are crossed), it's a tough day. I'm staying away from all social media today to preserve my sanity. I've had some awesome people who have let me know they're thinking about me today, and I'm sure there are others out there too. And I'm thinking about all the non-moms as well. Those who haven't met their partner yet, who can't have babies, who had a baby who didn't survive, who gave a baby up for adoption. This day is just as hard for them as it is for me. Hugs to everyone out there.
Oh, and to my own mom, Happy Mother's Day! I love you! Thanks for being amazing for the past 31 years I've been around and for being especially supportive during these past 3 years. I can't imagine my life without you.
And to my mother in-law, Happy Mother's Day to you as well! Thanks for raising an incredible son and for loving me like your own daughter. I'm blessed to have you in my life.